My second video is up on FunnyorDie. This one isn’t stand-up and doesn’t involve shameless flirtation from the stage with women of color. This video is what we in “The Business” call a comedy short, which is industry code for I’m too poor to make a feature.

I’ve been shooting these videos based on some of my more ‘visual’ standup bits. I shot this one in a day and it’s not as bad as being fucked in the ass by Kobe Bryant, but it’s definitely a first effort in a series of 3-4 that I’ll be making this summer. I’m about to shoot the next one in a week, which will be black and white with a voice-over by my friend, the uber-talented Michael C. Hall.

FunnyorDie doesn’t DO letterbox so it’s anamorphic or some shit and looks all stretched out like a Chinee action theater film circa 1972. As a result, throughout watching it, I feel like a ninja is about to jump from an elevated location and kick me in my solar plexus.

Anychink, the point is to watch it on FunnyorDie, leave a comment, and vote Funny. I can’t MAKE you and I’m sure some of you will vote Die because isn’t that fun to do?? BUT… if you vote FUNNY, I swear to GOD will give you 150k from the royalties for my next book! *

Well, maybe not, but a comment will guarantee you FREE TIX to any standup show I’m on in New York, LA, or around the country.

What happened to my LAST video that got 5k hits on FunnyorDie in 5 days? Why was it taken down?

Due to the idiosyncracies of libel laws, I won’t specify.

However, I do have a bit of unrelated advice: allegedly, whenever you’re hiring a closeted homosexual to do work for you, and God forbid, you have a disagreement about something, don’t ever accuse them of acting ‘bitchy.’ They will often respond by deleting things from FunnyorDie faster than you can snap your fingers three times in a circle and then sashay to a guilty glory hole in a Westchester bathroom. Just FYI, for those of you hiring an assissytant.

* Restrictions apply. Offer only good in pesos.

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